Reign of the Deep Queen, Version… 4? Demo

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Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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Joined: 08/25/2014

Yes, RotDQ is being re-written again. It’s an idea that I’ve had since 2013 (or 14), one that I want to do justice and actually finalize; the first version, Reign of the Deep Queen, was alright. Never got finished because the plot was going everywhere and I was forgetting ideas and making new ones, not settling on an enemy or goal for the character. Syemval or whatever I called the main character was never heard from again.

Second attempt, Reign of the Deep Queen Remastered, only made it to teaser release, but it was still an overall improvement! My writing skill had jumped a level or two, and I was prepared to pick a plot and stick to it. Got some attention, but for reasons I can’t remember wasn’t continued (probably lost the file).

After that, I made it into a role play; I planned to use it to get some character and plot ideas, but it crashed before we could move beyond the hatchling stage. Still fun though, and got a lot of attention!

Now this version should be the last of them, the one to be finished or at least make it to the climax- it’s a new year, I’ve got renewed enthusiasm and the maturity to be decisive about everything, a few characters I haven’t got stand-alone stories for, and with any luck this version will be the finalizer!

So now I’ve wasted 230 or-so words on this recount, time to get to the real deal: prologue and first chapter



A petrified stone lavafall exploded in a flash of blue plasma- the blurred image of a Night Fury raced through it, soon followed by a brilliant green Skrill.

The storm-loving wyvern chased him in a blind rage- roaring, firing, and beating her wings as fast as they would go. But for all of her unmatchable speed, it was useless in competition with his agility; in a few sharp turns and a dive, the black dragon vanished into the night.

She cried in frustration, searching the air in vain by the light of her body. Maybe if some clouds had been in the sky she could have found him again, but the air and sea were calm. He was long gone.

A purr that resonated through her very bones called her back to the dormant volcano that made up the island. The Skrill fired one last bolt into the air, and answered the summons. Waiting for her was a Great Death, with mottled grey scales and blood red thorns. The queen blended seamlessly into the volcanic stone around her, only her bloodshot eyes truly standing out. She stared bitterly at the empty sky, the glint of a sinister mind at work behind them.

The Skrill landed at her feet, and bowed her head. She waited for the cold, sharp, life-ending blow of a claw as big as her head, but no such event happened.

‘There is no need for grovelling, Kilstreak’ the Great Death hummed.

“But I have failed you… the defiler escaped, and I am ashamed”

Yes, he remains alive for now. But perhaps it is for the best…

Kilstreak frowned. “My queen?”

‘You job is not done. Set out for the neighbouring nests immediately- and tell them that whoever brings me that Night Furies wings shall be rewarded greatly’

Kilstreak straightened, a sly grin stretching across her face. “A bounty on the defiler? He wouldn’t survive the season! If I may ask… what would the prize be?”

The queen froze for a moment, snapped her jaws into the sea, and pulled up a small shark. She gulped it down whole, still alive. ‘The Heart of the Earth’ she stated.

Kilstreak bowed one last time, then took off, echoing the queens words to the rest of the island before heading out. Within moments, they were chanting a single, simple, but beautiful sentence; The Blood of the Night for the Heart of the Earth, the Blood of the Night for the Heart of the Earth, the Blood of the Night for the Heart of the Earth…


(425 words. Should I extend on anything or fill any information gaps?)



1~ “You call this fighting?”

Amelia sat motionless on the gravel beach, front paws buried slightly under the round black pebbles. Ocean water would occasionally seep between them and gently embrace her claws, the waves calm and quiet.

With her eyes closed, it was almost impossible to make out her dark blue form- with wings tucked in, tail curled around her feet, and ears pressed flat, the content Night Fury hatchling may have well been a worn-down stone on the beach. The little sunlight that made it through the dense fog softly illuminated golden speckling on her chest, like flicked paint that glittered.

Behind her, a mountain rose from the middle of the island, smoke gently seeping out of the summit- a dormant volcano making home for hundreds of other dragons, and most of all, the Deep Queen. Dragons of all kinds were going in and out of it constantly, all flying with a purpose in mind, a job, something to do.

But being so young, Amelia had not been given a role in the Nest yet. Even though she was far more capable than any other dragon in her brood, the Honour dragons had refused to acknowledge her.

A Timberjack stalking the beach interrupted her relaxed state, with dull purple scales and a slightly redder belly- she was looking around for something, anxious. Amelia turned her head and looked at her, waiting for her to spot her scarlet eyes gleaming out of the mist.

She stopped, sniffed the air, and looked at Amelia. “Finally!” she cried out. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you, what are you doing out here?”

Smiling, Amelia broke her disguise and walked over. “Catching some peace and quiet. What about you, Lintu? Aren’t you cold?”

She nodded. “Freezing. I don’t know how you manage to stay out here so long, let alone enjoy it. Come on, it’s time to go back in”


Lintu motioned her nose at the sky. “When the fog is too dense to see the sun” she recited.

Amelia’s wings drooped. “Oh. Right. I did promise them a show…”

They took off, crawling in through a crack in the rock that would be too small for most adult dragons to squeeze through, arriving at an open chamber lit by molten rock below. Dragons were milling around, some just wondering, most trying to get somewhere to do something, but not that they concerned the two hatchlings. They needed to get to the top, where a stone platform jutted out of the wall. It wasn’t quite the summit, but still set the scene for Amelia’s business.

Waiting for them was a gang of young Monstrous Nightmares. Most were fiery reds or toxic greens, but a slightly larger, and sickly yellow one stood in the middle of them. Black patches on his wings and body refused to reflect any light, and his white underside was dirty with soot and dust. Gharoveen, the big bully of her brood, with an ego that outmatched the Queen’s. He bared his teeth in a sarcastic smile. “You’re late, red-eyes!” he taunted.

While her eyes were indeed a brilliant scarlet, it was a poor insult- she knew that they worked to her advantage in intimidation. She took up a calm and collected stance, back and neck straight with her wings held to the sides. “You’re lucky I showed up in the first place”

“Why, scared?”

“Not worth my time”

He scowled, claws tightening their grip on the stone floor. He hated it when someone thought of him as not worthy. “Well just let me show you how it’s done!” he growled before launching himself at her.

She easily side-stepped, watching him almost slide off the platform. He roared again, crawling back up and tackling her to the ground. Throwing him off and pinning his back down, she locked her jaws around his horns and shook her head. He wildly thrashed his tail around, slapping her back and stunning her for a moment. Taking the opportunity, he swung his head around and spat some fire at her chest.

“Hey!” she yelled. “You said fire was banned!”

Ignoring her, Gharoveen lit his body up and got out from under her. He snarled and arched his back. Amelia was tempted to use her fire as well, but she held honour highly- if he wanted to break his own rules, fine by her. But she would not sink to his level- a level above would do just fine. “Fireworm!” she spat.

“Sand Wraith!” he screeched back.

They collided again, this time both of them fighting to prove superiority. But before any serious damage could be done, an adult Nadder dropped from the sky and pulled them off each other. Green and orange in scales with shining black claws, both of them forgot about each other and curled into tight balls. She did not look impressed. “How did I know that you two would be at it again, hmm?” she asked. “You should save your energy and anger for real enemies. Brawling will only weaken you”

“But you said to fight for my honour, Thenor!” Gharoveen argued.

“You call this fighting? Petty squabbles with hatchlings, ones smaller than you no less, will not heighten you honour- if anything you will taint it”

He looked away and said no more. “What about you, Night Fury? Have any bold words to say?”

Amelia stayed silent. “Smart. Next time I may just let you rip each other apart- goodness knows it would make my life much easier”

With that, she left, making sure to give them both a right slice across their backs with her tail as she flew away. Gharoveen gave Amelia one last demeaning scowl and left with his gang into the cave systems.

Lintu crawled out from behind a rock she had leapt behind when fire came into play. “I think you showed him!” she congratulated Amelia.

But she wasn’t in as good of a mood as Lintu, gazing thoughtfully at the caldera opening. “Amelia?”

“Why does Thenor always stop us?” she wondered out loud.

“What do you mean?”

“Thenor. She’s the only one that breaks up the fights, but only between me and Gharoveen”

Lintu frowned. “I think you’re reading too much into it. But the Hunting packs will be leaving soon, come on!”

Amelia reluctantly followed her friend. Maybe she was right, maybe she was just looking for a mystery that wasn’t there. But there was still that inkling of suspicion in the back of her mind… like something was telling her to be careful.


(1090 words. Again, any information gaps or over-explained speals better left empty?)


| 16 years old, Yr 11, female pronouns, Australian, Asexual, Social anxiety |

GMT +10:00 (Aus Eastern Standard)

Interests: Biology, Various games(mainly Skyrim, Subnautica, Forza Horizon), Art, Animals, Teaching, Creative Writing


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Behold Sir Marvelous! Edit by VoSpader, original concept art by Cory Strader

Species: Sea Dragon Leviathan

Gender: Male

Story(not to be taken seriously, intentionaly bad)

Marvelous was a good SeA dragn, not like the others!!! He was in a fight with a warper one day and damaged it, and it accidently teleported him to berk!!! luckily the people liked him and now he lives peacefully with poeple and helps catch fish! But he is afraid that he took the carar desease with him... because why else would the warper attack him?



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InTheTardis2's picture
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Joined: 09/05/2015
Please read Mercury!

Tracking for definate!


Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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Joined: 08/25/2014
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