the greatest joke in existence

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Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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Joined: 08/25/2014

me

__________________

 

Tis me,

ZestyDragonWing

ace, female, and definetely not a bee

<-----0----->

 

Latest News Regarding Me:

Im gone boios, and I'll give y'all one free parting gift- fan characters listed here are now free-to-use: go nuts my dudes, I aint using them any more. Fan fiction plots are free for the taking, so if somebody wants to take over the Alpha Series, doors open.

If you want a request done before I leave for upwards of several years, shoot me a PM before the 30th and I'll do it- THIS ONLY APPLIES TO PRE-EXISTING PERSONALISED ONES. Recolours do not count to this.

I'll still be on the Discord server tho, if you truly must find me.

 

<-----0----->

 

Art Requests

Currently Closed! PM me with the details of the drawing you want done. I'm best with dragons, getting pretty good with human skills, and can create digitally, a symmetrical 3D model, or on paper with graphite, pen, and/or watercolour.

ALSO: it may help to send me reminders every few weeks since i am not very reliable and will forget things quickly.

>> Gallery <<

 

 

Fanfiction

The Alpha Trilogy

Reign of the Deep Queen | Refuge of the Blue King | Age of the Midnight Prince

https://image.ibb.co/ji115w/trilogy_card.png  

(haha see i can edit)(sort of)

We know that Vikings settled in the Archipelago a little over 500 years ago, but what stopped them before that? In the Dragon Nest, a stolen child must try to overthrow a tyrant. Her descendant, a volitile soul, runs from revenge until he cannot go any further. His son, a strong-willed leader, takes on a new name and builds his own empire until the past catches up with even him.

(Progress on this will be slowing down since I've become comfortable with my writing skills and styles and I am moving into original works and more ambitious projects. AotMP will be finished in the same style it is currently in, but RotDQ and RotBK may be shorter and lower priority, if I decide to do them)

 

<-----0----->

 

Characters!

 

Ebony and Flies With Storms

(is this a self-insert-babies-first-oc type character?)
(absolutely, what do you think i am???? quality content creator?? u fool....)

https://i.imgur.com/KntmXPM.png

by me(left), and Chameishida (right)

Dramatic and petty with no impulse control to speak of, some would say her intelligence is wasted on revenges over small things, always done in very unique and specific ways. That’s not to say she’s a bad person, or easily angered; but with an oddly selective memory, she can sometimes have a (unintended) threatening presence. Storms, on the other hand, has a far more calm demeanour and often acts *begrudgingly* as a vent for Ebony, be it random ideas or long-winded complaints.

- Working on detailed design of Ragus (her sword)

 

--BACKSTORY UNDER WORKS--

 

 

Pallus- the liberated Roman

- has a terrible memory (especially with dragon species names)

- generally avoids conflict

- has absolutely become an epic bard that parties hard

- trapped in a permenant state of i-kinda-know-what-im-doing-but-not-really-so-its-awkward

 

 

Yzar and Lochiel

https://i.imgur.com/gb2HP12.png

- hey who wants some immortal quakens?

- thats right, these lovely ladies have surpassed mortality to be together

- only got art for Yzar so far, but Lochiel will be gettin some tasty eye-treats soon

- i love them so much.

 

Sir Edmund

By Silvernight

The draconic embodiment of a middle class victorian era man, with extra RUFFIAN SPANKING ABILITY

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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Joined: 08/25/2014
for the sake of everyone on

for the sake of everyone on the forum, I will keep all of my late night/sh*tposting here

starting with

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

gravy roll

Anikin Thundercloud's picture
Anikin Thundercloud
Offline
Supreme Viking Champion
Joined: 04/19/2015
...

My life's a joke to cause I was born on April 1st :p

__________________

=The Forgotten Demigod Assassin=

 

 

Before reading

 

 

 

 

When you get back into school but don't remember anything

And then get so much homework that you dont want to do

Then forget to do it and turn it in and you get called out

Finally ur mum is home and knows that you screwed up

Fin, cause in the end yer grounded :p

When you see your fried but they walk away from you

Or they notice you in the hallway

Fandoms

 

 

 

 

Oh look you made it to the end, good for you

I accidently clicked out and didnt save.... crap...

Fire..

When you and your friends find something cool

When all of ur teachers give you HW thats due the next day

Seeing a teacher durring the summer

Not even google has the answers

When your books get made into bad movies

When you dont just have a ship but a fleet of ships

When the party starts with out you

When the light wants to shine brighter than your future

When your ship becomes cannon

Then the feels hit

When your Fandom gets insaulted

When someone wants to take your book

When someone talks about your hair being naturaly messy

When some one tries to  tell you that you're wrong

When someone you hate attempts to be menacing

When you hear a scary noise in the house

That moment when you have a massive point

When your friends are at a contol point and you come in to save the day

When you have pizza but it gets stolen

When you work but need to go faster

Finally geting a kill halfway into a game

When you get to the objective but get caught on it

Talking to some of your friends

When mom asks for your homework

When you're kinda mad at your friend at someting stupid that they did

When you almost shoot your friend in game

When you do something epic

When your mum wants your phone

Whenever i get a car...

When you get the hero and everyone wants to kill you

When an X-wing sees you all alone

When my parents are talking about my future

When talking to someone you dont really trust

Being stuck in a conversation with a person that you hate

When you leave your people

When people cant stop asking you questions

When you're about to go off on someone

When some one says that they love you

When you can't even be that cool

When you come to save the day but the whole team is camping

When you drop in and get rekt

Some days you just need to face plant..

When you know all of the parts of the lightsaber

When you miss something old

When you hear the song of ur people

When someone tries to sink your ship

When someone says something stupid

When you drop your book and the bookmark comes out

The look that you have when you see someones outfit thats a major no

Dat epic catch you make  (i didnt start with when, twice, in a row :O)

Getting away with something (omg three times! i need cake for this..)

Quick, turn! (i want more cake for this, i dont get paid enough)

Talking myself through math (like serriously)

Blocking the final boss even though you have no idea waht to do

Telling ppl that ur british (btw i update this when....)

It was a trap (^^ a certain girlfriend isnt onnn and im bored)

When someone takes ur cake >.< (oh hai Dragon cause ik u read this)

How it feels when the game crashes (and Marg and Master probably)

100% srrs i did this when i was younger (i have no life shut up)

I DONT WANT TO BE ON THIS PLANET ANYMORE (ajhssdkls;dskdepdcf)

How RTOTJ should've went (im back from my massive nope)

Trying to avoid question (6/4/16 6:30)

Checking for messages mid escape

Getting burned by friends (hmmm.. not real burning)

Ah, there we go! (again im hella bored)

My friends when i say i'm ok (still bored)

Eachtime someone wants to kill me (which is a lot of times)

What happened to all the gifs I just put..... Wth as a British person I shall not stand for this!!!!

Screw it I'm getting cake and some tea >.>

 

getting that hero kill on one hp

Seeing someone get burned

 

I hads a dragon make this this for me o.0

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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well golly gosh sir what do you think your doin

THIS ISNT ABOUT YOU

Anikin Thundercloud's picture
Anikin Thundercloud
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Joined: 04/19/2015
...

I know o.0

You're still a bigger joke than me

-trying to be nice plz don't hurt the thunder-

FloofQueen's picture
FloofQueen
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Joined: 08/02/2016
Good ol' late night meme

Memes

__________________

Colress's picture
Colress
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Joined: 06/06/2015
...

Tracking for dank memes

__________________

 

  

 

Bavelly
Offline
Chief
Joined: 07/25/2016
You should download the app

You should download the app ifunny, I think you'd really enjoy it. if you do, subscribe to me, same username

NarixuZen's picture
NarixuZen
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Joined: 11/11/2015
Valkyrian ate my subject

Greatest joke in existence:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bug-free SoD 

__________________

 

Note:

 If you replied to my post in a topic and it's important, please PM me the name of the topic! It's a security check if I haven't noticed it.

 

 

ALAARM!

 

 

Instagram & Discord: Ask.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Made by me. Please give credit when you use it.)

InTheTardis2's picture
InTheTardis2
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Joined: 09/05/2015
Ha! Good one!

Ha! Good one!

__________________

"The Truth was hidden once, but that was long ago,"

 

-Tenébris

Colress's picture
Colress
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Joined: 06/06/2015
...

..."Bug Free" and "SoD" in the same sentence? That's like, an oxymoron.

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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Joined: 08/25/2014
i just want to play subnatica

i just want to play subnatica but my coputer is a POTATO with some WIRES sticking out of it and a bar of soap stabbed into it with the word motherboard engraved into it, and a big 'ol bit of twiiine going from it to a plastc mirror for the SCREEAN.

so I cant play subNOtincan and explore the lost-but-not-actually-lost-cause-we're-kinda-lookin-at-it River for all the different skulls and i cant fight th e  s e a  d r a g o n  who is a gosh darn SE.XY beast because holy granoli loook:

Image result for sea dragon leviathan

spawn me hundreds of em for the AMBIENCE alone

 

he has glow glow nose like snail

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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Joined: 08/25/2014
new scissors paper rock

new scissors paper rock game
Gun vegan carrot
Carrot blocks gun, vegan eats carrot, gun pewpew veagn.
apolgy to any vegans out there

LissaFish's picture
LissaFish
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Joined: 02/12/2017
You are making me laugh

Seriously laughing out loud right now. Your late night self is a comedian

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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Joined: 08/25/2014
its lik a year old now but ur

its lik a year old now but ur welcome

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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mhmneb

ya know how sumtimes a thing comes up and it really bothers you but its kinda small and not actually a problem like if someone shows even the slightest bit of attitude on the forum people just jump it instantly and like even if your rightly a bit ticked off i.e. cool well organised rp that i put alot of effort into and had no one sign up) people are just going to bulldozer it and make you feel worse

like somedays it feels like no one has personality here cause its all pretty much the same there are no temperamental people or hyperactives or anything its just yes they are nice and reasonable and take non-biased views on stuff and play the neutral in an argument so does everyone else

its ot neccisarily a bad thing but there are days when its like am i really talking to a human here?

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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so its not tuesday right

so its not tuesday right

Ginger Clancy's picture
Ginger Clancy
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Joined: 03/02/2014
Nah, it's Wednesday

Nah, it's Wednesday

__________________

My profile picture was made by Phoenix107. Check out her DeviantArt page here!

http://phoenix107.deviantart.com

Dusk the Seasong, drawn by Adopto66

Amphitrite the Aquaborealis, by 1Flower! :D

This is Raster, the fictional Albaraptor, by Megaboltphoenix.

Giotheal, a second Albaraptor. <3

Here's his headshot.

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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No, Thursday. 27/10/2016 also

No, Thursday.

27/10/2016

also skyrim remastered comes out tomorrow im so exciteeeeeed

Ginger Clancy's picture
Ginger Clancy
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Timezones are magic from my

Timezones are magic

from my perspective, you're living one day into the future...

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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spoiler: nothing new is

spoiler: nothing new is happening

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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uuggh cannot wait for brisbane

you know what honestly just get rid of townsville. it has no reason to be there, its useless. the only thing we do is sugr cane farms and even then theres plenty of that iin other places

plus its in drought, theres nothing to do and the strand is a pathetic excuse for a beach- 'wowee its lookin wild on the water today the waves are lapping a whole 40cm onto the sand!!!!'

tiger sharks breed in the little bit of ocean between magnetic, its surrounded by mountains (actually a hill thats a metre or two off being a mountain by definition)(* castle hill just one more tremor)(we believed in you) and the tourism business is practically nonexistent.

hey we realy could just commondere the military base supplies and a boomboom three fighter jets could finsih it in a ffew minutes. of course you'd get everyone out of the place first its just the city itself thats a black boring it of despair and anticlimacticness

Red Wind123's picture
Red Wind123
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le bloop

Those are some spicy memes you got there

__________________

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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hey i just realised why my

hey i just realised why my tute class is called tutorial in full; a huge waste of my time, incredibly vague, useless and longer than it should be

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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School uniform u mean   I

School uniform u mean

 

I dress to impress

 

 

Administration

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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Hands up if you to feel the

Hands up if you to feel the

http://i.imgur.com/lFoMfHa.png

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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My aesthetic is subliminal

My aesthetic is subliminal messaging and passive-aggressive comments

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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heyheyhey

I have a request for any modders out there, can I get a mod that switches the audio files of the dragons with the guards in Skyrim?

Cause I think it'd be great if you were getting arrested and the guard just screamed at you, but if suddenly someone was telling you to keep your eyes on the skies, you would comply

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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wootwait

hey kids guess who's got a mushy ring growing in the back yard

 

can't wait to be snatched away by the fae folk cause holin heck its about time

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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ugghhhh

"How much drawing are you going to do today?"

       depends on if i caN DRAW A STRAIGHT LINE OR NOT BECAUSE RIGHT NOW I AM  D Y I N G

 

 

 

 

I have tried to get a slightly curved line fom point A to point B about 13 times now and it is not working

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Ah yes, my favourite song at the moment, 'Prepare for Battle!' in which the lyrics are just 'blood of the tiger' over and over again with one 12 second segment of what I am fairly sure isn't actually words.

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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snitches get stitches

When ur friend is wagging class but there's no assesment on, it's the easiest subject of all and you ain't no snitch

Wutend Bonfire's picture
Wutend Bonfire
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anc his assignment

okay i made the front cover of my research book, thats enouh work for today, lets pack it up everyone. lets pack it up, working is done, we're done people, we can all go home

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Icee Glacier
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AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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__________________

Stop Boulder Class shaming!

BOULDER CLASS! BOULDER CLASS! OI OI OI!

Hai.

Welcome to my signature.

Since I am a person who is very, very lazy I (at this time) don't feel like making my siggy "fancy"

So, here's some stuff 'bout me.

I am a girl.

I like the color Blue/teal.

My favorite dragon class is Boulder Class.

 my main dragon(s) are a Screaming Death named Odin, and a Skrill named Jayfeather.

I love Doctor Who, Merlin, Chuck, Physch, Harry Potter, The Kane Chronicles, and other nerd-y things.

My favorite Httyd dragons whose names start with the letter s are Screaming Deaths, Shivertooths, Skrills, Scauldrons, Smothering Smokebreaths, Snafflefangs, Shovelhelms, Sword Stealers, Snifflehunches (+Sneezelhunches) and Seashockers! (that's alot!)

And I am usually friendly :D

In-game name is: IIicedragonII (No, not lice dragon. Those are capital i's not l's. And you simply pronounce it as "Ice dragon")

Friend code: hmm.. P.M. me if you want it. Can't take any chances o3o

And I'm a proud member of The Phantom Lords! (ROAAAAAAAAR!)

I'm also a proud member of the recently-made forum clan The Sisterhood of Clams!

"We aren't perfect! We're women! We take what we want!"

I'll probably post some bios about my dragons, but I'm too lazy to do it right now XP

 

 

Amazing picture of my main viking OC, Eira Glacier, by Pixel!

Picture of my bestest-Screaming Death-buddy, Odin, by Dragonrider34!

 Picture of Odin eliminating the largest threat known to vikings: BUTTERFLIES!! Awesome picture done by ScarfyWings! (He's not a fan of butterflies, deathly afraid of them actually. I can only shudder in horror as he has now discovered they're flammable..)

Epic picture of Odin done by WutendBonfire!

 

 

Info card on Odin by ze great AllyNadderRider!

 

Picture of Jayfeather by Dragonrider34!

 

 

Oldscratch Johnson by Gigimon!

Amazing picture of Seawings done by Freakzter!

 

Picture of Spottedleaf by Tyrannosaur66!

 

Picture of Mage by FlamingHusky!

Adorable picture of Gadget by KareKare!

Amazing edit of Armakillo done by Siren-Spirit!

 

Permafrost the lone Snow Wraith by Huntress of the Storms!

Great edit of Ignis my Monstrous Nightmare done by Frytha!

 

The Acidic ScuttleSting! Idea by me and this amazing picture by NightmareRebuff!

My ever-so-adorable Pan-Puffle Plumpkin by Sky and Ocean!

Blight the nightfury/razorwhip hybrid adopted from Tyrannosaur66!

Sea Glass, my first ever Aqua Borealis by Kcrocket & 1Flower!

Picture of Bluestar being... Bluestar by AngNadder!

 

Armakillo picture by Wildfire78!

Cute Shivertooth blinkie by Candyblast!

Picture of Graveyard admiring his precious chicken by NadderForever!

 

 

Picture of Doopliss by Dragonrider34!

Clan Stuff/Miscellaneous:

(right now it mostly has things for the Sisterhood of Clams, however if I find some phantoms stuff I shall add it to this section as well)

The Sisterhood of Clams' adorable mascot, Clament! (Done by the clan leader, Sky and Ocean!)

Awesome Elder picture of Me, Zuski, and Gummy Bear (our codenames, respectively.) by Sky and Ocean!

 

All clam members by our clam leader, Zuski/Sky and Ocean!

 

My clam badge by Zuski/Sky and Ocean! (The derpy bird represents me perfectly.)

Check out the dragon fight club! It's a cool sort of 'event' area where we stick dragons head-to-head on eachother and vote/see which would win in a fight!

 

Currently there's a tournament going on! Which side are you on?

Fire..

Or..

Ice..

Personally..

Team ice FTW!

 

 

Lil' short:

Jayfeather: C'mon friend, this thing won't hurt anyone!

Odin: I do not have time to mess around with strange objects.

Jayfeather: Look, just hold still.

-Seawings makes sure to not be in the shot of the camera-

-click-

Jayfeather: Aha! Got it. Ahh fish paste, my wing was in it..

Odin: Hand that over this minute! I... want to see if you got my good side..

Jayfeather: HA!

Seawings: G-guys lets just bring this thing to Ice, o-okay?

Odin: GIVE ME THE PICTURE!!

Jayfeather: YOU'LL HAVE TO FIGHT ME FOR IT!!

Odin: GIVE IT HERE YOU EEL WITH WINGS OR AM I GONNA HAVE TO-

-Jayfeather flew off chuckling-

-Odin roared after him-

-Seawings whimpers and decides to follow-

(Funny picture of Odin and Jayfeather by Wutend Bonfire!)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ha! Got ya >:D

(awesome gif of Odin by Peymae!)

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so i bought a pocket watch the other day

crow: *yells*

me: YES

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humour levels: lethal

"The sounds of the Ghost Leviathan were created from two people screaming and noises from a bull"

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Wutend Bonfire
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Gotta love how I'm wasting

Gotta love how I'm wasting time going through the stranger files of my steam folder rather than woRKING ON MY ANCIENT HISTORY ASSIGNMENT, LIKE I SHOULD BE

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I've developed a strange

I've developed a strange habit of responding to pple saying 'why am I so ____!?" with 'aren't we all' and i can't tell if i am saying it humourously or not

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ONE DAY I SHALL AUDITION FOR

ONE DAY I SHALL AUDITION FOR THE VOICE BUT INSTEAD OF ACTUALLY SINGING I AM GOING TO HAVE IT START WITH CHEERY UPBEAT MUSIC AND THEN SUDDENLY IT STOPS AND I START SREAMING INTO THE MICROPHONE THEN FALL TO THE GROUND CRYING AND YELLING AND ASKING STRANGE UNANSWERABLE QUESTIONS LIKE

WHAT COLOUR IS GLASS

WHY AM I LIKE THIS

WHERE DOES THE SKY STOP

 

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yahaha

Im gonna do so great this term for art, I have figured out a way to draw a robot shark and other robot things in my book with it still being classified as work

 

 

and I have drawn about 3 different versions of one tree w solar panels on it instead of leaves now, and have plans for a tiger with a bionic leg and eye.

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Normal Me: - Cannot sleep

Normal Me:
- Cannot sleep during the day
- Doesn't dream/doesn't remember them
- showers once a night
- always hungry
- Can guess the time when indoors

Sick Me:
- napped 3 times
- lucid Skyrim dreams
- 3 showers
- slept through dinner time, had some like 2 hours late
- all sense of time and direction lost
- can barely remember what happened 4 hours ago

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an accurate recount of real events

*Quietly places a lemon in the dish water while your back is turned*

 

 

HAVE YOU HEARD OF A REVOLUTIONARY NEW TECHNIQUE CALLED..................

 

EVAPORATION

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Wutend Bonfire
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winks with ears -sparkling lobes-

Time to get into that cold, nippy saddle

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Wutend Bonfire
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Maccy D's, more like Smacky

Maccy D's, more like

Smacky Bees

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Wutend Bonfire
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when doing assignments

did u just assume my reliability

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I love how quickly lessons w

I love how quickly lessons w relief teachers dissolve into absolute chaos- the teacher borrowed some kids guitar and has been playing it all lesson and now they're trading techniques at the front while the pple next to me have a container of honey, three boys are pointing at each other in a triangle formation and my friend is drawing on the table with her tutour

 

We're in maths.

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GUYS GUYS GUYS WHAT

GUYS GUYS GUYS WHAT IFF

REVERSE FIREWORM

 

Ten dragons

one LEG

THE FORCE OF A KICK POWERED BY TEN THIGHS

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So, background: I'm working

So, background:

I'm working on an art assignment where I'll be staining a shirt with food items, for various reasons yadida

And I had a bag of practice items today, and is the strangest mix of things to have in a bag, especially without context;

- Old single bedsheet

- Container of spaggetti mince

- An orange

- Half a pickle

- Used coffee pod

- A tea bag

- and like the tiniest remnent of chocolate icing in a tub

 

So, fast foward to end of english where my friends were talking about it, and someone goes "Art is the perfect excuse for doing something bad"

They pause for a moment, thinking about what they just said.

"...........Murder"

Which became these hypothetical situations:

 

"ITS CALLED SENDING A MESSEGE" I yell as I plunge a knife into your throat

"Is my art too confrontational for you?" I ask my next victim, atop a fountain of blood and a skull in one hand

"What is the name of your installation?" the police ask me, appealing to my sick sense of humour

"Only the most intelligent of people will understand my work" I say after slaughtering everyone in the building

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so i got bored again

https://image.ibb.co/b8CoXb/so_i_got_bored_again.png

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Staying home sick today, so

Staying home sick today, so what do I do?
I soak a shirt in tea water, thats what.